Don’t Do That. Or That. Or That.

38 Comments

We went out to a nearby pumpkin patch this morning. The kids have really been wanting to do this, so we waited until the grandparents could join in the fun. However, once we got to Lane Farm’s Pumpkin Patch I quickly discovered that the place did not want anybody to have any fun at all. There I found all that is wrong with America wrapped up into one acre.

I can’t recall ever being anywhere with so many “nos” and “do nots.” We were just at Hearst Castle where buzzers would sound off every time a Japanese tourist stepped on the Persian carpets, but that place was like a playground compared to the pumpkin patch.

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We still had fun, but it was the same fun we would have had even if Lane Farms hadn’t been so freaking lame as to hang signs on every surface of the “farm.”

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This is how Lowe enters the water—every single time. He’s awesome.

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They both thought they were hilarious doing stunts on the merry-go-round.

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38 Comments on “Don’t Do That. Or That. Or That.”

  1. it is a shame that they are most likely told to hang them signs by there insurance company because some lawyer told them they would be held responsable if something happen its how the U.S. is now. what a shame

  2. I DO NOT like the word DON’T!! It really makes me want to DO whatever I’m not not supposed to do!!! Pumkin patches are great fun though, aren’t they! Great photos.

  3. As been sung in the past:

    Signs, signs, everywhere there’s signs
    Blockin’ up the scenery, breakin’ my mind
    Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign

  4. Yep, lawyers..especially the bottom of the sign. Our court systems need to be fixed..more common sense less how can I stick it to you.

  5. It is called “Deep pockets” Always shoot the messenger, the Farm owners, that is. Going there was voluntary, maybe find another farm? 🙂

    Paul Thomas

  6. Continued… (unsure where my post went).
    This post was a reminder of why we left CA – after growing up there- sold everything, bought our boat and never looked back. California is the most over regulated over taxed nanny state in our union.
    Love you guys!
    sv LunaSea.
    FOBOTY

  7. It must be a California thing… here in Central Florida at the Local pick your own Strawberry Farm you can Pick and Eat unwashed strawberries, ride on an unsupervised zip line, ride the hayride with (gasp) no seat belts! Swing on a tire swing and play in a really big (huge) pile of sand, my boys favorite! Down the road at the Christmas Tree Farm , pumpkins seasonal, You can actually pet the goats,AND feed them, also hold obviously dangerous rabbits and chickens and ducks! There is a giant trampoline, which is a lawsuit waiting to happen, bounce until you are sweaty and gasping for air… add in the rides on what are clearly very deadly Shetland ponies and you have the combination for a gloriously fun afternoon… and we didnt even have to sign a waiver!!!!

  8. North Carolina Apple Farms are about as bad but instead of signs that tell you not to touch/feed/climb they have signs that tell you you can get hurt/electric fence/Llama will spit/goats will bite. I guess that gives you at least a chance to have fun and not hold them accountable.

    I agree with Roger…Our court system needs to be fixed.

  9. Went to our local pumpkin patch “Grandma’s Pumpkin Patch” yesterday and they’re the exact opposite. Hell, they even had a 10′ tall hay pyramid with **GASP** no one monitoring the area at all. Old rusty tractors for the kids to climb all over, goats/rabbits/cows to feed, and heavy metal cars for the kids to drag around and pull each other (and the pumpkins) with. Good times can still be found for the little ones, I can assure you.

  10. Sad to say but I think we also have to accept that the signs wouldn’t be there if some parents didn’t let their kids do those things (like sit/jump on and crush pumpkins) which in turn ruins the experience for all others. I am fortunate to live in a place where signs like that are not necessary (yet?) and kids can still climb haystacks.

  11. Note that also you apparently have to tether your child to a merry-go-round in the States! I’ve never seen that up here in the similarly over regulated Canada.

  12. So funny…I thought maybe you were embellishing a little until I saw all the signs in your photos! This happened to us once in Amsterdam. We rented someone’s houseboat for a couple of nights and almost every appliance and utensil had some kind of a sign on it telling us what not to do with it. We left after one night! Thanks for your blog; I enjoy reading about your adventures.

  13. I would put up with the signs for a quality place like that. Really looks nice! You can bet people would be feeding the animals!

  14. Welcome to the communist state of California! Your experience of the “Pumpkin Patch” is why we left California and will never return. Its a beautiful land filled with too many people and rules. I love your pics. FYI-there is a great pumpkin patch in Moorepark that is way more kid friendly. I can’t remember its specific name but its off the 23 just north of the 101.
    http://www.underwoodfamilyfarms.com/

    1. It is the Underwood Family Farms. I went through high school with Craig Underwood, nickname “Underdog”. He is a wonderful guy, or at least he was back in the late 1960s.

  15. Wow, you guys are so lucky. My life-mate and I were at Lane Farms 3 weeks ago and they made us wear hard hats!

  16. I note you did not photograph the sign which advises photography is not allowed.

    Clever, but omissions are, of course, not allowed.

  17. It must be hard to be in a business where you are afraid of your customers. Do they think those pumpkins are permanent exhibits?
    By the time I was 11 I had learned to drive on a Farmall-H.

  18. Don’t kids (and adults) just love growing
    pumpkins! You can have such massive fun with
    them, turn them into lanterns, faces, pumpkin
    stew.! The kids also love coloring them in too.

  19. That second photo of Lowe jumping into the pool almost looks photoshopped – he’s suspended so high above the water. Made me chuckle. Love when kids are so balls out about physical activities. Just joyous.

  20. “There I found all that is wrong with America wrapped up into one acre.”
    Please don’t blame those poor pumpkin patch owners from protecting themselves from that scourge of America-THE LAWSUIT! THAT’S what is wrong with our country & most likely fear of a lawsuit by some no account klutz falling off the haystack & breaking an arm forced all the sign postings. Sad huh? I once knew a landowner in CA with a huge piece of property & watched in horror as he threatened a ‘citizen’s arrest’ on a guy who had just landed his glider on the man’s property. When I called him on it he told me he never has a problem with people using his land until someone sued him because that person had landed wrong on a rock & broke an ankle! We want our freedoms but they must come with accountability.

  21. We visited a similar farm this summer, but with hilarious warning signs. My favourite was “try not to stick your fingers through the fence, because this pug might bite you. If you do insist on sticking your fingers through the fence, try not to be tasty”.

  22. That is ridiculous! I get some of those rules, but no picnics or parties? Might was well just say “moderate levels of enjoyment only”.

  23. Welcome to SB…it isn’t all bad! I swear….the zoo is great! I am sure the kiddos would love it…happy travels!

  24. We have a park in Pa like that. We call it the No Fun park. Maybe an interesting experience for your lucky kids who generally get to play so freely? “Observe, children….uptight Californians in their natural habitat….”

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