We woke up to a beautiful Minnesota summer day ready to celebrate Lowe’s tenth birthday. We no longer have kids in the single digits. Having kids is a great way to constantly remind yourself of the passage of time.
His birthday makes me think back to myself at his age. I would spend my weeks at a school in the suburbs, and my weekends at Grandpa’s farm with dogs and cows. At ten my uncles would have been there, oiling their boots and their shotguns, getting ready to go shoot ducks, and I would have felt like an interloper. My saving grace was that everyone looked up to my dad, and I was his son, so my pale white arms and my never broken-in boots would be ignored, or at least go unmentioned. I was okay, even if I was different.
At that time my dad would never have thought I would grow up to be what I am. Whatever that is. I looked up to him, as a kid does, seeing a man that could navigate the corporate world city life. At the same time, he could show up at the farm with a funny joke and a bag of groceries for his dad, my grandpa, and stand head and shoulders above the farm boys of his youth. At least in my mind’s eye.
Sometimes I think about our expectations for our kids. What do we expect of them? What do they think we expect of them? I know that Lowe—no matter how much he looks up to me, and how much his young-man future-plans for himself match up with what he probably thinks I’d like to see of him—will likely not be like me at all.
I’m not a hunter. I’m not a good ol’ shit-kicking country boy who zips in to the city during the week to take on the corporate world wearing a three-piece suit. Yet as a kid that’s all I wanted to be. Like my dad. Lowe probably won’t study stocks like me. He probably won’t cut out of work each day to jump in the ocean. It’s really unlikely that he’ll live on a boat at my age. Why would he? Who does this? Almost nobody. Why would I expect that this lifestyle would be something that gets passed down from generation to generation any more than a farm boy having to stay a farm boy?
It’s sort of freeing to realize that I’m not shaping what he will become. I’m just helping to shape the person he will become. What Lowe does as that person will be entirely up to him. Just like I was in no way destined to a vagabond life on the water and third-world roads, Lowe is in no way destined to follow my path. He’ll carve his own. We all do.
All that to say that I’m enjoying watching him grow up. He’s kind, strong, funny, wild, and he loves his Mama more than anything else in the world. What more could I ask? Happy Birthday, Bud.
Spent a quiet day around Grandma and Grandpas, with the aunts and cousins there as well.
New inflatable kayak. So far, it seems pretty good. Lowe had no problem ripping across the water in it.
Aunt Toni trying to keep the oblivious dog from getting torn apart.
Lowe starting a fire, Grandpa style. He’s all boy. He added another pocket knife to his arsenal today. Nothing says ten like blowtorches and sharp blades.
11 Comments on “Lowe’s Tenth”
Know you cherish those times at Grandpa Herman’s farm. It was a special place just because family spent time there with him. Miss him yet. Your parents raised a terrific caring man. That’s all any parent can ask for. Wouldn’t be surprised that Lowe grows up the same with the same values. May all your journeys be safe.
Pat, that is a wonderful tribute you paid to both your father and your son.
I once read, that the measure of a successful man, is one who has earned the love and admiration of young children and the respect of his peers and elders. My guess is, your a pretty successful man.
Happy birthday Lowe, your blessed with a great mentor.
Poignant observations Pat.
Well said Pat. Your blog and the childrens’ ages mark the time for me… Already 10. Wow.
Are those kids in school yet?
No. We don’t believe school is the best place to learn. We’re capable of teaching them both how to read and write, as well as how to be good people. Turning those things over to a teacher we don’t even know doesn’t seem like a good choice to us.
Bums- Got my hat. Better than advertised. Many thanks!
Awesome!
Bloody hell, ten! I cannot believe that Lowe is that old, seems I have been following your adventures for only a few years, but I realise it is way more than that. Happy birthday Lowe from Sydney, Australia.
l also loved the musings on parents and their kids. It made me think of things a new way, as someone who has never known his dad.
Just out of curiosity, do you think the kids will look back and read these all someday?
Happy Trails and Safe Travels
Pat, I believe all you said about Lowe and your Dad was spiritual and totally inspired by God. God bless you for the wonderful thoughts and being so right on! Tommy